A full English Brexit

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Poem by Roger Jones, from Lincoln

We’ve had the referendum regarding the EU,
‘Remain’ got 48 per cent, whilst ‘leave’ got 52.
The ‘Brexiteers’ have won the day with xenophobic trend,
And trade with ‘Johnny foreigner’ appears about to end.
I wonder what the future holds as I roll out of bed,
And reach into the bread bin for my Danish wholemeal bread.
I grab the virgin olive oil – from Italy it came,
And pour some in the frying pan – rapeseed don’t taste the same!

I fry some Danish bacon, without the bacon rind,
With four ‘Frankfurter’ sausages – those of the German kind.
Two eggs, perhaps from Belgium, each has a double yolk,
They could have come from Denmark, or Scandinavian folk,
And those Dutch fried tomatoes always go down well,
And French imported ‘champignons’, add greatly to the smell.
Occasional Spanish omelettes, I really do enjoy,
Also, the odd ‘hamburger’, which I’ve eaten since a boy.
I spread my toast with Kerry Gold brought from the Emerald Isle,
Pile on the Spanish marmalade in traditional English style.
I pour a mug of ‘latte’ from Italian coffee kit,
And munch upon a French croissant, that’s been warmed up a bit.
I take a slice of Gouda cheese and nibble it with glee,
And from a Spanish bunch of grapes, I pick just two or three.
But I begin to wonder, along with my ‘compats’,
Come Brexit, will we get our fix of saturated fats?

Rising up from table, feeling slightly ‘shreky’,
I know I should have chosen a ‘Continental brekky’!
The Swiss could sell us muesli, the Scots their Quaker Oats,
Ere Scottish Independence obtains a few more votes!
We could try ‘Arbroath Smokies’, and ‘Tattie Scones’ to follow,
’Though some might find this Scottish fare a little hard to swallow.
It could be that within two years, our favourites disappear,
And our full English breakfast – ‘Brexitted’, I fear!

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